Cross dressing girl?

We're at the park and I see this lesbian (I know because she is here with her partner) who I would consider to be cross dressing (at least if women had to do that for acceptance). She's wearing baggy cargo shorts, loose fitting t-shirt and has short hair, no earrings or makeup and her nails are guy length with no polish and wearing neutral flip flops. She's small chested (I'd say an A cup) too which the t-shirt totally hides. If it wasn't for the hairless legs and voice she would totally pass for a guy, and the legs most people wouldn't notice anyway.

Conversations at the doctor's office

So today I went to get my allergy shot. It was a typical day for me.
Since it was going to be warm I wore a denim halter dress. They had a
new receptionist working there so when she called my name and I came up
to sign the paperwork for the insurance, she was surprised and asked me
twice if I was Joseph. :)

When it was time to go in for my shot, the nurse who normally does the
shots complimented me on my dress, which struck up a conversation on
denim skirts. From there we got to sun dresses and I ended up giving a
few fashion pointers to two of the nurses on what to wear with a skirt
and what to avoid.

It's days like this that my study of the feminine really pays off.
Sometimes I think I know more about how to be a woman than some women
do. I don't know if that is a good thing or not, but I'll go with it.

Friday night

Friday night we actually had a chance to get out for a change. We went
to Theresa's Osaka in Toms River and met a few friends of ours. The
sushi was incredible and we had a really good time. I hope we get a
chance to do it again sometime soon.

Possibly the best advice ever

I just had to repost this blog entry... This is from:
http://crossdresserswife.com/index.php/2010/08/19/no-one-is-normal/

Pass this around. Let's get the word out about this blog post and maybe
save a marriage or two.

No One Is "Normal"

So much hate, ladies! So much hate! I don't know when I became "bitch
about my freaky husband lady" but it's getting a little old. It's not
that I don't want you to express your frustration – I've been there, I
understand exactly where you're coming from, and I want to be able to
help – but is it really necessary to spew the fury with your life
entirely onto your crossdresser? I know, I know, you're having a rough
time of it. Work sucks, the kids suck, your in-laws suck, the neighbors
suck, your car sucks, and something expensive just broke down in your
house AGAIN. Now was NOT the time for your husband to "come out of the
crossdressing closet" so to speak. But he did and now you've got to deal
with it.

It's hardly fair, is it?
You just wish you could have a "normal" husband, right? Like, for
example, that neighbor down the way who has that pretty yard and that
pretty house and her 2.5 kids are SO well-behaved, it could make you
sick? Or your sister-in-law with the lawyer husband and the champion
dalmatians who just bought that nice loft downtown?

One of the hardest lessons I ever had to learn once I "grew up" was that
real life is exactly like high school. You can try hard to make it not
like high school – cut out the drama-llama friends, for example, or lose
weight/stop drinking/actually wake up on time – but at it's core real
life is filled with the same petty bullshit as high school, just on a
larger scale and with more money worries. Backstabbing bitches still
exist and they will still backstab you at the likeliest opportunity.
That douchebag jerk who bumped you in the hall still bumps into you in
the hall, but now he calls it a joke and is just trying to "lighten up
your Monday, bro." And, like high school, you occasionally come to the
crashing realization that, just like high school, NO ONE is normal.

Your perfect neighbors might get intimate twice a year. He may be more
interested in porn than people and she might be schtupping her
brother-in-law. Your fantastic family might be drowning in debt and
fighting every night of the week. No one has a perfect life and that
Norman Rockwell Normal that tv commercials and pop-up ads try to sell
you is pure fiction. There've been studies done and books written (The
Nostalgia Trap) on that very subject. Society needs us to think that
there's some normal standard to live up to and it needs us to feel
guilty or angry when we don't. You already know that money is made by
making us feel bad about ourselves and our lives. We've been told since
we were very small that a man acts one way and a woman another. When our
spouses don't act the way we've been told they're supposed to act, we
get angry. But why?

One piece of advice I find myself giving over and over again these days
is this: Take a Good Long Look at your own perceptions of marriage and
the man you married.

When you married him did you think you needed to "fix" anything about
him? His hygiene, the way he kept house, maybe some of the friends he
keeps or activities he participates in? Why do you think that? If he's
good enough to marry, why do you want to change those aspects of him?
Because it's more convenient for you? Because society frowns on the way
he spends his spare time (gaming, watching sports, playing poker, etc)?
Because it doesn't involve you?

If you want to change aspects of him (not related to crossdressing) then
you need to figure out WHY and possibly sort out if his changing is
really and honestly going to make your marriage better. A crippling WoW
addiction is one thing but getting together one night a week for some
D&D with his buddies is something else entirely. If his hobbies aren't
hurting your marriage by taking up 1) more time than you (as a family)
can reasonably spare or 2) more money than you (as a family) can
reasonably spare, then what's the harm?

With me so far?
I want you ladies who are feeling so very put out at your man for
crossdressing to take a few minutes and relax. I know it doesn't seem
fair. He gets to have hobbies and maybe he doesn't spend nearly as much
time helping out around the house as you'd like plus these days he
hardly ever has time for the kids… and THEN he drops this crossdressing
thing on you. And you, of course, are a chore-finishing, job-working,
soccer-game-attending, homework-helping super hero. Why should you have
to put up with One More Thing?

Because.
Just because.
Think of it as another hobby, if it helps, but one that you have a
little say in. One that he wants to share with you. One that has the
potential to really open up avenues in your marriage that you never
thought of before. One that, yeah, maybe you might not want to share at
Jimmy Jr's playgroup, but one that is important to the sanity and
security of your marriage. Because it's important to him to share this
with you, which means it's important enough for you to take ten minutes
out of being Super WifeMom to listen.

The other point I've found myself making A LOT lately is simply this:
You married your husband, not some dude. You (hopefully) married a guy
you can laugh with, hang out with, get stuff around the house done with.
You married a man with a personality, not a caricature of who a man is
supposed to be. Sometimes aspects of his personality will grate on you,
sometimes you'll go together like PB&J. But, like Chris Rock says, you
have to love the crust of a motherfucker, not just the white part of the
bread. You're not going to like everything about your spouse, but
hopefully you married a guy that you like to be with. Hopefully you
married a man you like to hang out with. Because if you married some
dude just to be married, or because it was expected of you, or because
you just felt like it, or because you were running out of time, or
because he knocked you up and you needed a baby-daddy… then you might
not be able to make your relationship work.

The most important thing to remember about being in a relationship with
a crossdresser is that if You Love Your Husband then you can make it
work. You can. I promise you. You've got my word on it. If you love your
husband enough to try, and KEEP trying, even when it gets hard or you
get angry/annoyed, then you can make it work. It might seem easier to
quit, to walk away, to say to yourself that some other man will make you
happier or will be less effort… and that might be true. There might be
some other guy out there who is easier than being with a crossdresser…
but I guarantee you that if you work hard to make your relationship
work, you won't find another man who's more loyal.

Hear me out. Seriously. I have NEVER EVER worried about my husband
cheating on me. I am not an ugly woman but I've got some extra curve and
I always have. I probably always will. I'm part Italian – I've got some
extra hair on me that sometimes, in the winter, I'm not so quick about
maintaining. What I'm saying is that I'm not the most alluring lady out
there… but when we pass a hot red-head in a short skirt on the street
and my husband takes a second look I don't think to myself, "That
asshole is checking out her ass!"

I think to myself, "Damn it, now I have to help him find that skirt."

I once asked Melanie, relatively early in our relationship, "Would you
ever leave me for her?" (referring to a famous actress)
She said, "Nope. Never. Not even for her."
Me: "Really? Never?"
Melanie: "It would take you doing something phenomenally awful for me to
leave you. Like cheating on me. Possibly murder. Depending on who the
murder victim was, of course."
Me: "Okay… why?"
Melanie: "You accept me. Really, honestly, 100% accept me for who I am.
Do you think I'm going to find that with just anyone? Right. Uh huh.
Nope, sorry, you're stuck with me."

Then he noogied me.
But you get the point.

IF you want to make your relationship with your man work, you can. You
CAN. But if he, the man himself, is not worth it to you, if saving your
relationship with that particular human being is not worth it to you,
then you need to consider ending your relationship. But don't tell him
it's because of the crossdressing, because you would be lying. That sort
of lie can screw up a person for the rest of their life. Tell him the
truth. Tell him it's because you were expecting marriage to be
different, that you married the wrong sort of person for you.
Crossdressing has nothing to do with it, it's just the last straw, you
just need someone who better fits YOU.

If you want to leave, you don't need permission from me. You need to
figure out why you want to go, the real, down deep core reason you think
your relationship isn't working. But I'm not going to tell you that
crossdressing is a valid reason to go. Because it's not. If you want to
make your relationship work, ladies, you can. It may be hard. But if you
love them enough to try, you can make it work. I promise you. You don't
have to go. And you don't have to be angry.

You've got my word on that.

(On a side point, I would like to note that a crawling 7 month old who's
figured out how to crawl stairs SUCKS. Add rapidly growing head full of
grey hair to my list of less-than-attractive attributes.)

It just proves my point...

While on the way home from our vacation, we had a rather interesting
thing happen. My wife heard someone comment about a woman going into the
mens room. Now, that "woman" was me, and I was not trying to look female
at all. I have said many times that most people don't pay attention and
only pick up on a few superficial things when they see someone. This
comment proves my point. I was wearing a pair of cutoff jean shorts that
were baggy (and mens I should add), white sneakers, dark brown spandex
camisole (no frills or anything like that) and carrying my purse like I
always do. Oh, did I mention I hadn't shaved my arms or legs in over a
week and was sporting a 4 day beard? Yes, my hair is a touch long, but
it's a good 2" above my shoulders, so it's hardly a womanly length and I
have a rather obvious receding hair line. I still got "read" as a woman,
though.

If you're worried about how well you will pass when you go out, keep
this story in mind. Sure, some people will figure you out, but most will
not see the tell tale signs and will only see the heels, long hair, and
boobs and register "female". We all pass far more than we think we do.