I must look like a different person

This morning I had to run out to the store for a few things before work.
I was in my Abby/Catholic school girl mode wearing gray/black plaid
pleated skirt, black knee socks, white button down shirt, black sweater
vest and 3" clunky heeled mary janes. While at Walmart I walked right
past a friend of the family who knows me well. She didn't look at me
except to see that there was a person walking by. There wasn't even a
hint of recognition on her face.

Japanese food...

Yesterday we were out to lunch at the Japanese restaurant here in town.
I decided to wear bootcut jeans and my red/white striped V-neck sweater
and my new red boots under the jeans. My wife used the B word so I know
I looked good. :) Anyway, before we left, our daughter needed to use the
restroom and I needed to touch up my makeup so I grabbed my purse and we
headed to the ladies room. While we were in there, the waitress (a
younger Japanese girl) came over to my wife to see if everything was
good. She commented that she hadn't seen us in for a while (we aren't
exactly regulars). She also commented on "how pretty she is" in
reference to me and asked if Katya was my daughter or Rain's. Rain said
she was hers and the waitress commented that she had thought that since
Katya looks alot like her. All in all I would consider that a non-read.. :)

Cross-Crossdressed?

I just had one of those moments when I had a funny realization. Here I
was, mens jeans (I only wear them when I'm gonna get dirty), bra (with
breast forms of course), mens T-shirt, knee-hi's, my nails done a lovely
shade of red, wig, makeup, earrings... So in effect, I was a guy
crossdressed as a woman, wearing men's clothing.

Is that an oxymoron?

You look familiar for some reason...

Yesterday afternoon I was at Walmart and walked past a guy who
definitely looked familiar. It took me a few seconds to place him as I
walked past. As I passed I heard him say "Don't you live on Bowline?" I
turned around and told him "No." He then said "Did you used to live on
Bowline?" "Nope, I never have." "Oh, ok. You look familiar for some
reason. I guess that isn't it."

Yes, he does know me, but not as Heather... He used to work in the
office across the hall from my old job, where he knew me as Joe.

Applebee's

Last night we went out to dinner at Applebee's. My wife tells me that
she thinks the waitress figured me out, but she addressed me in the
feminine the whole time. I didn't see any indications of an issue at all
and the staff treated with courtesy and respect. I would consider that
a successful evening out.

Another one of those "boring" days

Well, I had yet another one of my "boring" days... I decided to do a bit
of a goth school girl look today (think Abby from NCIS) since I have a
new pair of shoes that I have been dying to wear. I headed out to go to
the bank and pick up a few things real quick. I stopped at Kohl's and on
the way out, as I was headed for the Jeep, there was a guy on his cell
phone walking the same direction on the other side of the aisle in the
parking lot. I heard him clearly say "Sorry, I missed that, there's a
gorgeous woman walking alongside me." I knew he was referring to me and
I turned and gave him a real big thank you smile. He said "Hey, I
couldn't help myself..." in a kind of an apologetic way.

At the bank I had some things that needed taking care of so I went up to
the tellers and told them what I needed. The lady asked to see some ID
so I gave her my DL and had my TG ID handy just in case. She took my ID
and didn't even give it a second thought. Now, there was an issue with
my request (apparently they have never had to do what I was asking
before and needed to make phone calls to find out how to do it). I was
there for a good hour waiting for them to figure out which forms they
needed to use. While I was there I chatted with the different tellers &
staff (about 8 older women). Every once in a while the teller would ask
me something (using my male name) from a bit of a distance where she was
on the phone. She kept referring to me in the male form (which didn't
bother me really since it was not meant to harm) and the other staff did
as well, but at the same time my appearance did not seem to phase them
at all. I could see that when a new employee was nearby and she said
"he" or "him" they got a confused look on their face until they figured
it out.

While I was waiting a few other patrons also chatted with me. One lady
tapped me on the shoulder and told me that the hem in my skirt was
coming out (which it was). An older couple commented that they hoped
they would figure the paperwork out before it started to snow (they are
predicting flurries tonight), and joked with me about a $25 referral
bonus the bank is offering. Another guy (mid 40's I'd say) got my
attention on his way out to joke about the referral bonus too since he
was in line when the older couple was joking about it. One teller
mentioned that she hoped they had it figured out before she got back
from lunch (it had been like 45 min already).

I don't think most of the patrons knew I was a guy, and if they did they
certainly had no issue with me in any manner. I was treated like any
other patron by both the staff and other patrons. Everyone was courteous
and respectful.

This evening I went to get my nails filled. While I was there I got the
typical non-reaction to my presence from other customers. That was until
a group of 4 teen aged girls came in. While they were looking at nail
polish, one girl sat down and was looking in my direction. We were maybe
5 feet apart and I glanced over her way. By the look on her face she at
least suspected I was a guy. I carefully watched her out of the corner
of my eye to see what she did. I saw her take out her phone and start
typing on it. I kept watching and saw her get her friends' attention and
then show them the phone. I'm sure she typed something like "that's a
guy". Then they all looked at me while trying to not look like they were
(it was obvious). They didn't gawk or make comments though so it was a
good reaction. I consider reactions like that one a good one since it
was reasonable.

All things considered it was a good day.

Anothe rquick update

Tonight I went with our daughter to visit Lisa's house for a bit. Last
night she invited us to stop over today so we figured why not. Rain
wasn't feeling too good so she stayed home. We stopped in for a couple
of hours to BS for a bit. It is good to just get out with friends once
in a while.

My day yesterday

Yesterday was a bit of an eventful day for me. I started my day by going
to get my nails painted since we would be going out to a party and I
don't have them done all that often. I went to the nail salon and the
place was pretty quiet. The 3 people who normally would do my nails
weren't there and the younger girl who works there was more or less
running the shop. She started doing my nails and a little bit later I
got that feeling like I was being watched. I looked over my shoulder and
there was Amy, the girl who normally does my nails watching. She just
commented abut the color and asked if i was going to a party last night.
Then Tim, the other guy who usually works on my nails taps me on the
shoulders and says "I want to make sure she's not screwing up your
nails" in a joking manner.

On the way home I stopped at Walmart for s few things. While I was there
I ran into someone who knows Joe but not Heather. It was pretty obvious
that she did not recognize me at all. We walked right past each other
and there wasn't even a hint of recognition on her face.

Last night we went to the Ladies Night Out in Toms River. We met with
Kimm & Sarah and did Japanese for dinner before going over to the hotel
for the party. The owner of the restaurant was a real trip. She sat with
us at the sushi bar and BSed with us while we ate. Another japanese girl
was there with her other half and she BSed with us as well. Afterwards
the 2 of them joined us for some dancing at the party which I thought
was great. I definitely want to go back to that restaurant with the
girls for dinner.

The turnout wasn't too bad at the party and I had fun dancing. I decided
to just drink soda last night instead of alcohol. I was glad I did,
because the little tramp had the nerve to show their face at the party.
As soon as she walked in I was pissed. I knew that if she stayed there
was going to be a problem.Rain said she has never seen me so pissed as I
was last night. I told her that they were there and she told Kimm right
away because I had told Kimm previously that there would be trouble if
they showed their face and came anywhere near us. Apparently, I wasn't
the only one who saw them come in. The bartender said she needed to go
and that she was definitely not welcome there. It made me feel good that
others feel the same way and took action to fix the problem.

Dinner with friends..

Last night I got a call from Louise that a few of the girls were meeting
for dinner. Since we normally do our own girls dinner out on Fridays
anyway, we decided to join them. It was nice to just get together with a
few of the girls and do a nice dinner for a change. As usual, we didn't
really get any reactions, even from the ones who knew us for what we are.

R.I.P. Bettie Page

The one and only Bettie Page has passed away in L.A. at the age of 85.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28185814/

All is well...

It looks as if I was right. The counselor wanted to know if it was OK to
work with our daughter and help her learn how to cope with the issues
related to Heather (among other things). She seemed to have a pretty
good idea of what it meant to be a transgendered person. We talked for a
bit about a number of items. In the end I left her one of my cards so
she could check my site out.

One of those phone calls

Well, 2 days ago my wife gets a phone call from our daughter's school
counselor. This is "the" phone call that I have been waiting to get for
quite some time. This was the phone call asking about "Heather". I told
my wife years ago that this day would come and to be prepared for it.
Well, today is the day that we go to meet the counselor. We'll see how
it goes, but I fully expect this to be more of a curiosity thing than
anything else. Either way I will be prepared with Heather's card and
some photos to show her when we meet with her this afternoon (not as
Heather, mind you). More to come later...

I'm an Au pair... Who'd have thunk it?

This was too funny not to share... I just got a text message from my
wife. Apparently the rumor floating my wife's office today is that we
have an Au Pair working for us (definition is below if you don't know
what I'm talking about). The buzz in her office is that Rain only works
because she wants to and that we have an Au Pair to take our daughter to
school, drive Rain around, etc. Now, this rumor just started today. I
wonder if one of the girls my wife works with has a child in the after
school program with our daughter and saw Heather picking her up
yesterday. Either way, I don't think I have laughed so hard in years as
when I got the text message.

Au pair
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

An au pair (plural: au pairs) is a foreign-national domestic assistant
working for, and living as part of, a host family. Typically, au pairs
are young women who take on a share of the family's responsibility for
child care as well as some housework, and receive a small monetary
allowance for personal use.

The title comes from the French term au pair, meaning "on a par" or
"equal to", indicating that the relationship is intended to be one of
equals: the au pair is intended to become a member of the family, albeit
a temporary one, rather than a domestic servant. In the best
circumstances, both parties benefit from learning about the other's culture.

An au pair placement is an arrangement where an unmarried person between
17 and 30 years old (age 18-26 for the U.S. program) lives for up to two
years in a foreign country as a member of a local family, helping in the
home for a set number of hours a day, often with at least two full days
off per week. In return, they receive a reasonable allowance and a
private room.

An au pair should be treated as an equal part of the family, not as a
servant, and shall not be required to wear a uniform. There can be
misunderstandings on both sides about what this means. The usual
practice is that au pairs eat with the family most of the time, and join
in some of the usual family activities such as outings and trips.
However, host families normally expect to have some private time to
themselves, particularly in the evenings. During this time, an au pair
might retire to his or her room to watch television, study, or go out
with friends.

Tasks can include taking children to and from school, taking children to
after school activities, cooking, cleaning, ironing, and babysitting.
Each placement varies depending on the host family. The au pair is given
a monthly allowance and all expenses are paid by the host family.

Just another boring day as me

Today was one of those days that just seem to blend into all the rest.
Thursdays are typically Heather days for me and today was no different.
I went with a brown short sleeve sweater dress, brown leggings, white
ankle boots with a 3 1/2" stiletto heel and a white long sleeve top
under the dress - pretty typical for me. I took our daughter to the bus
stop like I normally do then off to home to get some work done.

Around lunch time I headed to the bank to get some cash. There was a
line at the ATM so I waited my turn and as usual, nobody paid me anymore
attention than they would anyone else in line at the ATM. Next I hit
Dunkin Donuts to get some coffee (for Rain, not me I hate coffee). When
I walked in the lady (who has seen me in there a few times before)
cheerfully said "Well hello there, how are you doing?" Now this isn't
how she greets everyone and I only stop in as Heather maybe once a
month, so its not like I'm a regular. As I was paying for my order,
another (older) lady who appears to be a new employee walked up and said
"You're looking pretty today" and gave me a big smile. Now that is
definitely not a typical comment to hear a woman say to anyone but their
niece or such. It definitely struck me as odd, but hey... a compliment
is a compliment. Did she know I was a guy? Hard to tell really.

Later in the day I went and picked our daughter up from her after school
program. I walked into the lobby and signed her out and then waited with
the other parents for 4:00 to come when we could all go retrieve our
children from the library. There are usually 40 or so parents there,
some with other children. I engaged in conversation with a few of the
parents while we waited and didn't notice any of the telltale "i've been
read" signs. Now, I don't exactly sound like James Earl Jones as a guy.
My guy voice is pretty run of the mill for a guy really. As Heather I
sound a little closer to Cher or such, not really feminine but not
exactly masculine either. One girl around 12 gave me an odd look when I
walked in, but otherwise nobody seemed to notice or care. When I headed
to the library with the mob of parents, again nobody coming the other
way (with their kids) seemed to pay me any attention. Even our
daughter's teacher, who knows "Mr. Irvine" on sight didn't seem to
really react. Now, she does not know about Heather (to my knowledge) and
we were like 40 feet apart, but she did glance in my direction and I
made sure not to make the mistake of locking stares with her. I
pretended to not really even notice that she was there. We'll see if
anything comes of that, but I seriously doubt it. On the way out to the
parking lot, Katya wanted to walk with one of her friends who she has
known since preschool. Her mom even asked me a question but didn't seem
to notice or care that Heather was there with Katya. I'm not sure if she
knows or suspects, but no reaction either way.

My next stop was DMV to renew the Jeep registration (it expired in Sept.
opps!). Last time I went to DMV enfemme I gave them my TG ID card with
my DL just to make sure I had no issues. This time I was feeling a
little more brave and didn't hand it over but did have it handy just in
case. The receptionist (they do an initial check to make sure you have
all the proper documents) didn't even flinch at my DL, which is clearly
male being presented by me. The ladies at the counter were just as
unphased by a guy in front of them dressed as a woman. I have to really
compliment the people that did the sensitivity training with these
folks. They did an outstanding job. I was in & out in less than 10
minutes without so much as a sideways glance from anyone.

My next stop was the nail salon to get my nails filled. Rain was already
there ahead of us, and Katya wanted a cookie from the bakery next door
so I took her over before I got started. While we were at the bakery,
there was another mom (that always sounds funny when I say it) there
with her daughter, about the same age as ours. The girl had a candy cane
and wanted to share one with Katya. The mom said to her daughter "I
guess it is OK so long as her mom says it is." I guess I passed... :)
Back at the nail salon I had conversations with a number of other women
with no ill reactions. If they knew, they certainly did not show it. On
the way home we stopped at McDonalds to get some dinner and I was
Ma'amed when paying for the food at the drive through.

All in all, it was just another boring day as me...