"I probably wasn't paying attention"

Truer words couldn't be spoken. Today when I was talking to my friend,
she made the statement "I'm surprised I haven't seen you around town.
Then again, I probably wasn't paying attention." We were talking about
the fact that I get out around town as Heather on a regular basis.

This just proves what I have been saying about passing for quite a long
time now. Some of us pass 100%, for the other 99.9% of us, there are all
kinds of telltale signs that give us away. Yet, at the same time, even
those of us that don't necessarily look totally guyish or girlish still
pass pretty well. The reason that we pass is because the vast majority
of people out there are so absorbed in their world that they don't
really pay attention to what is going on around them. If they actually
payed attention they would see that I am a guy dressed as a woman, yet I
would say that I pass 90% of the time. Why? Because "I probably wasn't
paying attention." 9% of the time the people see me for what i am, yet
at the same time I get Maam'ed or smiled at or a knowing nod from them.
The majority of those that do read us either don't really care or are
impressed with the fact that we are going to such an effort to present
as the opposite gender. They accept us for who we are and treat us as we
are presenting. This is what passing really is all about.

Another thing that really caught my attention was when she mentioned her
father's reaction to me at the birthday party. He wasn't exactly OK with
me or the way I was dressed that day. She told me "He'll just have to
learn to deal with it." I don't care what anyone else says.. This is the
statement of someone who is truly open minded, and in my eyes a true
friend.

To my friend, you know who you are. Thank you for being you and
accepting me for being me.